Home Birth of Jonathan Edward

I discovered a few months ago that I'm pregnant again (Yay! Mostly...).

My husband grew up as an only child and so he really wanted John to have siblings. I grew up as one of three, so I was OK with him being an only child :P

We started trying when he was nine months old and it just didn't happen. When I went off birth control with John, it only took us two months, so I just assumed that's what would happen this time. The longer it took, the more I was OK with only one kid. I mean, how cool is this guy?

Very cool. That's how. He sleeps like an angel (NOT like a baby), plays by himself, and charms everyone he meets into the John Fan Club. I think a lot of it has to do with how he was born. Now that I'm going through it again (and yes, I really am excited. It's just been three long months of morning sickness, tiredness, and remembering how draining it was to have an infant. And this time I get to do it with an active toddler. Yeehaw.), I figured I better record my birth experience so it doesn't get erased from my memory banks after this one! So here goes:



We decided to have John at home. I tell people this and they give me the "damn hippy" look. I'm used to it. This was a well-researched, well-informed decision. I worked for five years in a hospital so I know about the short-cuts and poor-hygiene habits that an over-worked, underpaid staff makes! I did a lot of research online about home birth, which I won't beat to death here. Suffice it to say, I was healthy, the baby was healthy, and hospitals are for sick people, not perfectly-fine babies.

Fortunately, we have a local midwife. We live in a city of under 30,000, in the middle of a bunch of farmland. The nearest Costco and JoAnn's are ninety minutes away! So I was pretty lucky to find Dr T:

She was incredible. We ended up not doing any childbirth classes, mainly because my husband works all the time. Which is my way of saying 'we forgot until it was too late'. But it didn't matter. She walked me through every step of the birth and told me what was coming up next so it didn't take me by surprise. She was calm and patient the whole time. I think seeing her just chilling in the corner and not rushing around made me a lot calmer, too.

I was due June 4th and went into labor at about midnight that night. This is my last pregnant pic

It's soo unflattering, I almost didn't put it in, but man! I was huge! I'm short and I only have a few inches between my hips and ribcage, so John went straight out. Funny story actually - when I was 4-5 months along, an old guy came into work and needed a copy of his receipt. I stood up and he asked when I was due. I told him, thinking 'cool! This is the first person to notice I'm pregnant!' He looked at me for a minute and then goes, "My God! You're huge! Are you sure it's not twins?!" He wasn't being mean, just asking, but it really burst my little happy bubble :P

So back to John - I went into labor at midnight on the 4th, which we really weren't expecting. Everyone told me to be prepared to go two weeks over for my first baby. Also to expect it to take over eighteen hours. I shouldn't have bothered listening.

I had never had a baby before, obviously. I had no idea what contractions felt like. So I woke up, and honestly just thought I really, really had to poo! After I sat in the bathroom for about forty-five minutes, I finally realized what was going on (I tell you, your brain really goes to crap those last few weeks!) and called my doctor. She, my mom, and my sister all headed over and Andy blew up the inflatable tub in our master bathroom. That thing was awesome. I know I didn't want a water birth because: ew; but I did want to labor in the tub so I could relax and float in between contractions. Which is totally how it worked.

I don't really remember a whole lot about the actual labor. When they say holding your baby makes you forget all the pain, they actually mean it! I know that Dr T had me do the low moaning through the contractions (I caught Andy smirking once about it - he told me later that I sounded like a cow. That's probably the closest I've ever come to stabbing someone in the eye) and I felt pretty disconnected from my body - like I was watching myself go through it and going through it at the same time. I was a little nervous about not having the option of an epidural, even though I knew I absolutely didn't want one, even if we went to a hospital (I was pregnant - my brain wasn't really working :P), but during the labor, I didn't even think about pain medication. People think I'm strong, but honestly, it wasn't an option, so it never crossed my mind.

(Yeah - I was having his child and he was bored. Trust me, he's heard a lot about that!)

My active labor only lasted six hours (for a total of seven. Eighteen hours, my ass!) which I believe is
because I was at home. I didn't have to rush to the hospital; there were no strange people poking around my bajingo to make me nervous; I knew my own bed was waiting for me when I was done. It was actually kinda nice. Dr T finally had me get out of the tub and sit on the birthing stool. I don't know what kind of demented psychopath invented those things, but they are not comfortable! I was supposed to lean back onto Andy but I kept thinking I was falling off. After a couple good pushes, she saw that John's cord was wrapped twice around his neck and he had meconium on him, so she told me to get back in the tub. It didn't really occur to me that I was about to have a water birth after all. It just sort of happened - and by that time, I was ready to get that thing out! Dr T told me I did a great job of holding him in place so everything had time to stretch out (I only needed two stitches), but my body just did what it wanted to, when it wanted to. If it had been up to me, she would have reached in and pulled him out by his ears the second she could see him...

I know nuchal cords scare a lot of people, and that's one of the reasons there are so many c-sections, but with a water birth, the doctor has time to get the cord unwrapped before he starts trying to breathe air. Which is just what happened. She pulled him out of the water and plopped him on my chest.

For a second, he didn't cry and I had one clear thought: "Oh my God. He's dead." And my heart stopped for a beat or two. But then he started wailing and I started crying, then Andy started crying, and then my mom started crying... I think my sister was the only one dry-eyed enough to take pics (which is why she isn't in any of them).

I'm not the kind of person who sees miracles all day everywhere, but I know there was one miracle right then: I have terrible eyesight. If I'm not wearing my contacts, I can see about six inches in front of my face. But when I heard John's first cries, I looked up across the room at Andy and saw him as clear as I've ever seen anything. Getting to see his face the first time he looked at his son was one of the absolute best moments of my life. You can just see how proud he is!

I saw one of those random quotes that everyone puts on Pinterest that said: I never knew how much I loved you until I saw how much you love our son. That is so the case!

After that, it was just a matter of getting out of the tub to bed (which was ten steps away! Possibly the best part...), getting cleaned and stitched, and convincing John to eat instead of sleep for six hours.

And at 7:10 AM on June 5th, 2011, I had my perfect little child. From the first day, he's been amazing. He's ridiculously laid back and happy. I am convinced that being born at home had a lot to do with it. There was no stress, no trauma, no separation from Mama. It was months before someone who was not family or close friends held him or poked him with a needle.

He's nineteen months old now and still just the same.

After having such an amazing birth, we're definitely giving his little sibling the same experience! I think I'll even plan to have a water birth this time :)